January 31, 2001

I love politics. I LOVE LOVE LOVE politics. It entertains me and keeps me fresh during my not-so-fresh times. So much do I love the wily world of politics that I am majoring in Political Science in university! One day I may even try my dab hand at politics - you never know, your friend Joli may one day be lying to people en masse just like the politicians of yore!

There ain't nothin' like tradition.

Ali G? no, not even inexorably nor exhortingly or exhaustingly. Man... inexorbably... that's a word only used for essays along with juxtapose and apparently.

erm... I dunno why they banned me from my site... maybe the content was too pornographic... like a teletubby with a reefer might have offended their already fragile psyches.

FAT BLUNT

sorry, I have a mature state of tourettes syndrome.

your terrible muriel... meeks there is the electronic equivalent to shit streaks on your bands website, what is that about.

btw the centered text (on this site) does not work for me... I'd much prefer the right aligned text... or the left... depends on which way you are looking. I'd change it myself but I'm unsure if the decision is unanimous... although it's pretty inconsequential anyways, format should always take a backseat to content. Just like the table of contents should take a backseat to the format. The table of contents is the most interesting piece of a novel.

I'll let you guys in on a secret... I think I am hanging from the umbilical chord of reality and I don't believe I'm able to operate in a normally. That might be the case or I might've just wrote it to calm the aesthetics.

Fuck politics, I'll say it again... politics can wipe my seat. Although it's undeniable that politics has achieved alot, in the name of profit when it's been undoubtely misconstrued with "for the good of many"... It's still unprinciple. It condones inequality. It's just rampantly manipulating and deceitful.

Lotta strong words... let's see if I can back them up... politics is based on power, the good for the few... that in itself just perpetuates everything we hate. the upper class snoot suits. It's significant, much in the same way religion and the royal ramily are significant... because it's there, you can't escape it. So the best way to deal with it would probably be with awareness but I'm talking about the entire deal... it's absurd and if were someone it should be shot.

January 29, 2001

hello hello, back from the grave like a heartless knave. and I ignore the rules because I dance like a fool.

watchmenow!

*break dances*

I personally think the international community should've invested their stocks and bonds in Australia in the strictest assumption that it's like "Muriel's Wedding". Mandelson affair, don't care, that bastard should never have molested those ponies. Every one else in the free world who exerts his free will over another, my sympathies, if my sympathies were two-week starved female lions, lie with them.

the University of Surrey Roehampton (God bless) have banned me from visiting my site. :(

January 27, 2001

The Australian Prime Minister also has a website. Complete with picture gallery and kids links. Fun for the whole family!

The Australian economy is weaker than American beer at the moment. Just terrible. It was worse before New Year, but the fact of the matter is that Australia wasn't quite in the shitter the way it is now before John Howard came along. Of course, I am not really in a position to comment intelligently on the matter because I haven't lived in Australia for that long since 1995.

I don't trust politicians. Not as far as I can throw them. Which, incidentally, is one of the reasons I would like to try my hand at politics. I don't know why this is, but it just is. So kindly stop eyeing me in that less than flattering manner.

January 26, 2001

I would also just like to say the Prime Minister of Australia is a complete fuck job. This man (John "Evil Goblin" Howard) was interviewed yesterday and asked whether it was true that Australia is descending into another recession.

His answer (said very sheepishly):

"Well, no ... no! Of course not. No recession." *eyes dart around the room*

Idiot.

Also go to today's Uber to read a funny little imagined scenario involving George W. Bush.

This disgusted me more than anything I've seen for awhile.

January 25, 2001

Just for starters, I would like to say that I really enjoy a good cigar. Call me manish, tell me I have balls, but it is true. Cigars rock.

Also, I have a lot of trouble responding to you guys because I usually do it in the mornings and I'm not thinking very clearly in the morning. Maybe I will start oddwording at night.

I agree with you Mikko and Vin. Art doesn't incite a person to commit a crime. The intention must already be in the person - there has to be something in a person's personality or character that must already exist. I think that people are born with the capabliities to do different things - including commit certain crimes, whereas others are not. Murder has been around much longer than A Clockwork Orange. Organised crime has been around a lot longer than The Godfather. If anything, it is the crimes that have been committed that inspire the art.

And I can't remember the last time I saw murder/rape/arson glorified in the media/cinema/music. Maybe you guys could offer an example, but I can't think of one. Actually, I've probably heard it sung about, but I've never heard the lyrics "Listen to me, kill your mother because she doesn't love you and kill your father because he fucked your sister." That's fucked up.

I _completely_ agree with what you say about parents, VIn. People don't want to take responsibility - don't want to ever THINK - that perhaps the reason their child cuts him/herself, gets into fights or kills another person is because they perhaps failed somewhere in their role as a parent. And there are some people who DO fail as parents. It's not enough to be there and give money and shelter. It's important to be emotionally and mentally responsible and caring as a parent. It is in human nature, as I'm sure we've all experienced, to want to palm off the blame to someone else when things go wrong.

It's also true that raising children is all of society's bloody responsibility. It should be a co-operative effort between the government, schools, and parents. The media also has a certain responsibility, but the media is the media, and money is money.

If you all tell me what your time zones are, then I shall calculate the differences. I think Mikko is in the Eastern Standard Time Zone, Vin and Han are on Greenwich Mean Time, and I'm in the Australian Eastern Standard Time Zone (+10.00). Tell me if I'm wrong.

January 24, 2001



I've always had a fairly broad perspective because from my a young age my parents took my sister and myself travelling. Both of them were immigrants, and were fortunate and hard working enough to have the means to take my sister and myself all over the world. I also have parents from two vastly different cultural backgrounds. I've always seen the world as bigger than me, and bigger than Melbourne or even Australia, because I've always known that my great grandmother was living in Budapest, and my mother's youngest sister was living on a remote island in the Pacific. I've always been terribly aware of where I came from and how lucky I am to have what I do. I think that travelling has as much to do with perspective as education and particular situations do. Vin, you say that you're not as well travelled as some of us may be, but you're still very well travelled.

One thing I think everyone should do is READ. And you can always pick the readers from the non-readers.

I used to be afraid of failure. It's harder for me to define failure these days because every time I've thought I've failed in my life, there was another low yet to come. Now I don't know what failure is, and I'm not bloody afraid of it. I'm living on my own terms, in accordance with my own values and beliefs, and in line with my own standards.

I don't feel like I need to know, at this stage, where I should be going. I'm not really afraid of the future, because I think whatever happens will have its merits, and as long as I don't start up a 40 000 dollar a day crack habit, life can't be that bad. Another thing I've learned is that life rarely turns out the way you expect it will. I know you're all thinking 'bullshit', but I swear to you, this is true. Whenever I heard a person say it, I wouldn't believe them. Now I know that there is nothing truer.

I am feeling very excited and optimistic about the future also. I don't have that sensation of moving up and away like all of you guys do - because, unlike all of you, I've actually returned to my country of birth. I don't feel quite so liberated, although I do feel as though I'm maturing. I'm glad to be getting back to university. I can't tell you all how excited I am about this.

I've decided to study subjects that I am incredibly interested/passionate about, but in doing that I've shot myself in the foot. So, even though this is a period in my life where I can't really look anywhere but forward, I've got this feeling in the pit of my stomach, my practical conscience telling me that I will be unemployable at the end of my degree. For four years I will be be immersed in Political Science, History, English, Classics (as in languages) and Archaeology. I've always had a feeling I would like to be a teacher, and now it looks as though I won't have much luck finding a job *other than* teaching.

Although I have always wanted to be Indiana Jones too. So maybe the archaeology will help me with that.

January 23, 2001

FUCKING QUICKDOT!!!

bastard piece of shit

that's it, from now on it's email.. but fuck.. I'm too damned lazy... :( fuck.. now I have to go back to quickdot.

I'm glad we're all grappling with all our little idiosyncracies here. Sorry for being a wet towel but is there anything more pressing, urging, titillating going on with you guys? This is the most exciting times of our lives, the initial jolt of freedom is almost heroin (no I haven't tried it). Leaving the country of our childhood vindicates us of the pettiness and the fixed focus we brought to our lives and scales back the magnification of the microscope. The world is no longer "just us", it's bigger than us and it doesn't care about us. But we don't care about the world, because it turns like a tire down some densely inhabited forest area.

This is the instant gratification generation and we are gifted with the rare ability to question our reality on a regular basis, while the other cattle mulch and accept whatever was crammed down their throats.

I have this feeling, it's rampantly optimistic, and it's like the scene in the matrix where Morpheus and Neo change the program from the sidewalk to the skyscraper (where morpheus jumps over and Keanu just falls). So the transition is what I'm feeling like... like the ground is falling away from me. This is my reality. Though the world imposes reality that may be skewed, I am attentive to a degree. But my reality is what I choose.

I'm content, but I'm comfortable. I'm sedate but I'm satisfied.
I use alliteration in excess.

Anyways. screw it. Right whatever, it's not my intention to tell what people SHOULD write about... I only felt there was a lack of something... then I tried to articulate the feeling I thought should be expressed...

January 22, 2001

Hey, those lesbian pics were alright!

But enough about my questionable sexuality.

There is a movie I really want to see - Sunshine - directed by Istvan Szabo. It's about 3 generations of a Hungarian family, or something like that. It seems interesting to me as I'm half Hungarian.

Oh la la.

January 20, 2001

chat is supposedly up, but I think it's just a bunch of hooha.... so um... keep your eyes out for chat programs...

lost two rants yesterday due to the sheer stupidity that is my college t1 connection. fiucking firewalls.

umm... got drunk last night and I do believe I woke up this morning with my first hangover. It feels like a horse took a dump on my head. Then wiped his ass and threw the fetid wad of tissue onto my head as well.

This is the christmas of my consumption. I'll be staying in Europe this whole year, which is a shame while fucking cool. Hopefully Kev comes down and we do some documentary, that would be wicked. I need to get a job. Fuck. There's so much I wanna do here... not including clubbing. DVDs, HIFI, cds cds cds. hmm... TV... fuck it... I wanna see the movies themselves. need to see movies. need to see movies.

Anyways, one of my hallmates is having sex with his girlfriend all morning so I can't borrow his TV and watch Killing Zoe. Quite shite. To "have" sex, that's an expression because no one can physically have sex. sex is an abstract. It's like to take a shit. When you go to the bathroom, you don't manhandle feces.

language, pfffffh, who needs it.

props to prash for pointing the latter one out, looooong time ago.

If you feel like shit your body is telling you that it wants something that is not getting.

The first thing that I do when my body starts to go spastic is to look at my diet and lifestyle. I like to ask myself these questions:

i. Have I been eating vegetables lately? If answer 'no', eat more vegetables, what the fuck do you want, colon cancer? If answer 'yes', proceed to next question.

ii. Have I been drinking more than usual lately? If answer 'yes', drink less, you fucking idiot, do you want your liver to disappear? If answer 'no', proceed to next question.

iii. Have I been trying to quit smoking? If answer 'yes', well done, but you are also a nerd - smoking is cool, everyone knows that! If answer 'no', say goodbye to lungs and proceed to next question.

iv. Am I pregnant?* Pee on a stick. If answer 'yes', shit pants, you've got bigger problems than a fucking headache you ass. If answer 'no', breathe sigh of relief and vow never to have sex again. Proceed to next question.

v. Have I been repeatedly banging my head against something hard? If 'yes' ... If 'no', then proceed.

If you have made it this far, and you are still having headaches, you probably have cancer, typhoid, 'the clap', crabs, and athlete's foot, and should go to the doctor very soon. :::crickets chirping::: Um, yes.

(*you only ask yourself this question if you are female, you waste of skin)

And now for some shameless self promotion:

Me, me me, ME me.

January 19, 2001

This is my advice to you, Mikko, is that if yo' hat starts to stink you should wash it with fabric softener. So it then smells like flowers.

First thing that happened when I met up with other people in my faculty enrolment today - two guys from the student union came in and talked and TALKED about how the school will try to shove glossy propaganda in your face and you should PROTEST and incite revolution or whatever. They went on and on, and the dean didn't care. If I didn't know any better I would think that these clowns had the support of the administration.

I was kind of chuckling to myself because as much as I admire the war like spirit of youth, and the testosterone fueled oratory, I think trying to spark major revolution in a school like mine is a bit gay. These are the reasons.

1. This is a good school with an intelligent student body, excellent faculty, rigorous academics and a good reputation. The first protest is going to take place on the 7th of March, and classes begin on the 5th. Some kids have worked really hard to get into this school. Why would they fucking test the waters like that on the third day of school? How fucking stupid do they think we are?

2. Something like 80% of the student body come from private schools in the Melbourne area. If you are unfamiliar with the private school system of Melbourne, think this: rich kids, snots who have never seen a poor person, and assume that they have really good breeding because Melbourne is technically the poshest city in Australia. Rich kids, 9 times out of 10, don't give a fuck if teachers aren't being paid enough. They've got heaps of money.

3. *deleted because it didn't make sense*

4. Australian kids are lazy. Riot, schmiot. What's on TV?

5. The 'get in, get out' mentality. This is, more specifically, why I wouldn't go protest. I'm there to get a degree, and hopefully get a few good grades (yeah, I is reachin' for the stars, folks!). I'm not there to fuck around and try to get myself kicked out in the hopes that maybe the professors get a few more dollars thrown at them. I'm there to get educated and then to get the hell out. I have no time for revolution.

6. You've missed the 70's by about 30 years, fags. The age of protests in universities in the western world seems to be pretty much over. Be glad that you have it good, and shut the fuck up.

Okay, so I didn't declare a major today. I went to my enrollment and listened to the dean of arts talk about the programme, how you should pick your subjects. He was an old guy who actually looked like Colonel Sanders, but not wearing the Southern attire. He said some cool things:

"Don't worry if things start to go bad for you, we can help you fix them up. Look at me, I got kicked out of this school and faculty when I was seventeen, and now I run it."

(I would have said it like this: "Don't worry if you fuck up. We'll pull you out of whatever horse shit you land in. For example - I got kicked out of this place when I was seventeen. And look at me now! I oooown this bitch.")

"Find something you're intellectually passionate about and then stick with it. The nutty professor syndrome is fine with us."

"All Introductory classes pretty much suck."

I'm liking it already.

I have to pick four areas of study for the year, and I don't quite not what they will be. I'm going to try to be broadbased so that later on I know that what I am studying is something I have narrowed down to.





January 18, 2001

I'm glad you like Uber, Vin. Sometimes it can be a bit shit, but usually it achieves a high quality of comedy. RANDOM comedy at that, which is the best.

I would write something more interesting right now, but I am running late for my university enrolment. Today I have to declare a major. I think I might choose 'criminology' just for a laugh. Bwahahah.

OK I found a chat utility where all you need to do is paste the code onto the page, but I'm not sure if I want to fuck with the blog html. So joli: can I just edit the index.html? just cut/paste the code on... cuz that's all I need todo. If you'd like you can check it out yourselves on webchatting.

sooo toodles.

I'll check it up write now MATEYS

fucking gonna watch ali G tonight, that rocks... last night got a bit drunk, don't think I wanna mix da reefa with alcohol next time, it makes everything go all spinny... but oh man... 12 monkeys... I can't get that movie out of my head... I gotta see it again. It's pretty awesome. Traffic is a movie I really gotta see... benicio del toro is the SHIT! "flipya, flipya fo real". Just purely, utterly and incontestably. The shit. There's just no other way of cutting it.

I'm avoiding a long, directed rant purposely because it would betray my thought patterns which are disjointed and diffused. If I feel strongly enough to seriously put the pen to the paper, I'll be more than happy to rant with kant. To address Mikko's ongoing interest with ICP and Eminem, I believe someone should seperate internal politics from whatever its created. If it works, then don't fix it.

I resent being called a scamp. A lovable scamp, however - it gives me strength.

You guys, go to Uber . It is amusing in a way that I use to have conversations with Han. Very random, obsucre, but totally fucking HILARIOUS!

HILARIOUS I say!

Did you know my classes don't start until March 5th? That gives me time a-plenty to work on this project.

Does someone want to develop a coherent layout? Or shall we leave it as is?

January 17, 2001

finished my essays all you lovable scamps.

What is interesting. Well there isn't much interesting these days. I'm going to drink tonight. Might take photos. That would be the fucking coolest. Might also get laid, but who's counting with the man with no fingers?

I certainly don't know.

January 16, 2001

I made little stortroopers of all of us. Guess who is who.

I don't know about you guys, but I really enjoy collaborating on this thing with you all. Considering we all live spread apart it can be a bit difficult, but I enjoy the creative impulses we all seem to share. It is a bit like a four-man message board at the moment, but we're all settling in to our respective academic routines for the semester, which can throw off the sturdiest man.

Oh yes - I've confirmed my place at the University of Melbourne for this year. I am currently enrolled in the faculty of arts - as to what my major will be is anybody's guess. I'm just going with the flow for now - seeing where the road takes me. It's a pretty tough university to get into just to 'go with the flow', but I'm not concerned right now. I don't have many concerns right now. :D

The cast page - I think Han has a point, because we all know so many different people and people would be missed (and pissed - maybe).

And as for life being contradictory - you know, it doesn't matter. Fuck it. :)

January 15, 2001

yes yes, we are under no pressure. This is a project of passion, although I could've also mistaken it for a four-man (generic man) message board. But whatever, I'll be doing the chatroom as soon as I reach closure on my essays. I don't think a cast page is a good idea, too many people and too little words to do them justice.

January 14, 2001

rejoice, for I puff and I also inhale

biiizatches

I also have to update this blah layout.

Okay, so we're going to get a chat room and proper archives off the ground. We also need a damn cast section which is going to be like 1000000 people long.

I finally quit smoking - after smoking pretty much regularly since the beginning of 12th grade (mid 1998) I am no longer a smoker! It has now been 12 days since my last cigarette, and let me say this now: Oh sweet tobacco how I MISS you! I am nothing without your rat poisony goodness. NOTHING!

So yes, you could say, I still have the urges. It's a tough habit to kick - some say tougher than a heroin addiction. I don't wish that I'd never started it, because me and my cigarettes ... we went places, man. We did stuff together. Sitting around on my hill, outside the cyber cafe, after sex ... we were buds. It's like cutting off a relationship that you REALLY enjoy and where you're REALLY satisfied, but you know ultimately it's unhealthy.

As I have now joined the whiney, preachy 'non smoker' side of the fence, I am going to try to be one of the good guys. I'm not going to yell at you if you light up around me, or you blow smoke in my face. If you want to smoke, that's your decision. I'm not going to tell you that it's no good for you, because I don't want to be all hypocritical.

And I REALLY miss it.

January 12, 2001

I think what we DO need to set up is a chatroom, I'll look it up... maybe set it up through guestworld.

Damn. You look so much older Han. And shit seeing those pics makes me want to start smoking again.

Just looking at the new pics on your page Meekz. You look fucking mean!

And a quote I saw today that caught my eye. Strangely enough, about technology.

It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has exceeded our humanity.

Albert Einstein, folks.

It's funny you should say stuff about our language limiting our expression.

You should hear me speak now. I've lost half my vocabulary. It's crazy. I'm getting stupid.

We should make a cast page by the way. It's going to be fucking long.

I have to get some pictures developed. I have five rolls of film sitting on the floor of my closet. One of those rolls contains a shitload of photos from the time we were jumping off the top of that kiddy slide at my apartments. Mikko jumped into that tree and broke off one of the fucking branches. Hilarious. I'll try to get them done tomorrow.

ALSO - I still have Langkawi photos to send you Meekz. They're in a fucking envelope but I'm so fucking lazy.

I'll try to get them out by Feb. And if those crazy tree jumping photos turn out, I'll send some to you and Han.

twist twist
I'm confused
I feel the clues of being used

Whenever I write, I hesitate. It's quite annoying, it's like when your shitting and... ok, I won't continue that metaphor. But it's like when you have a huge idea on your mind, it might be language that limits the expressino of that idea. But that means it's out of our power to improve our expression, and that makes development sound futile. So it's blatantly not that. It might be a state of mind, if I'm excited, I wouldn't be able to articulate clearly what I'm feeling because I have so much energy I need to get rid of. Anger does about the same thing.

Is that too abstract for you? I may have to stick a paintbrush through my head.

jolly santas in a row
laughing at me wherever I go
I only look up and smile and wave
they give me the finger
and walk away.

And Technology is NOT gay. It merely needs soothing words to be spoken and soft caresses.

January 11, 2001

that's all just another photomanip, meeks, I'm still waiting for your head resting on your fingers looking back at the bloody stump of a neck.

I like to think of the future as a very intimidating fat person, who is running at me on a horizontal plane where vision is unobstructed. At 50 km, I see: A very intimidating fat person. What am I going to do? Nothing because the fat person is 50 km from me. At 40 km: A very intimidating fat person at 40 km. Again not much recourse for action because well... I'm out of arm's length. So the kilometers get burned... 30, 20, 10, 5, 3. At last he is one Kilometer away and I think, "Sweet mary, the intimidate is 1 kilometer away from me, what am I to do."

The moral of the story is this: Do not wait for the fat person to be 1 km away from you.

I leave the intention's of the intimidating fat person open to the individual's feelings of wrongness.

January 08, 2001

I'm flying off soon for london via amsterdam where I will have to start pretty fast on my four essays, which is pretty much my only source of anxiety right now. I'm gonna miss everyone here, but I'm equally curious as to what will happen in the next 11 months. God. Anything could happen. Rivers erode and towns flood in days, in terms of all things drastic, 11 months is a hell of a lot of floods.

So I'm approaching this new year with fear and confusion mainly. Confusion out of my frustration of being unable to speculate on the future. Fear mainly because I'm quite an upright person and hate to be out of my element, and the future is not my element. Which then makes me the person evasive to change. But change occurs whether you barricade the doors or not, so I'll relent with the heavy objects and brace myself.

January 07, 2001

Mikko, you're not a fucking nerd.

I've been thinking (a lot) lately about why everyone I know does drugs. I can't think of at least one person who hasn't smoked weed. I think that in order for me to go hardcore in my drug usage would require that I start thinking I'm immortal. And I am so very fucking mortal. I don't want that heart attack or stroke. I don't want to have to wait to come down and for the pain to stop.

Fuck that.

I get nightmares even when I do the soft shit.

We need some Han input here.

January 06, 2001

WORK!

Yeah, it works now! We're going to have to delete some of these tester fucking posts.

January 04, 2001

My New Year's Eve was fairly cool.