My boss gave me a letter of poor performance yesterday, came up to me and told me to have a look at something and gave me the letter detailing how I was unprepared to deal with the responsibilities attached to my job, mentioning examples from last weekend.

After trying to take the criticism professionally, I have become officially despirited. While not a great place to be, it's fun to work myself back up to a stable level of confidence. I've done it alot. Something I've learnt over the years is that depression is more like a natural defense than something that should be avoided like moldy produce. Your brain is telling you something long-standing in your life isn't right. That's all.

Hitting a wall (make sure your thumb is outside of the fist) and listening to Type O Negative is excessive and then you secretly enjoy feeling shitty.

I didn't feel like quitting, I feel like toughing it out, I feel like changing my lifestyle so I get more out of my daylight hours, I'm certain looking back 6 months from now, I'll be astonished and say, "Slap my knee, it was all so easy!".

And now...

rap sane things between meals
my gold comes in piles my man don't diss
my swank wheels after it's been
taken out for trials