Sometimes I think one of the reasons I am such a failure when it comes to quitting smoking is because of all the times we used to sit around and have a beer, sit at the cyber cafe, san fran coffee, kerrys, gcb, wherever ... with a cigarette. I don't have a physical addiction, or even an oral fixation. Mine is more of an emotional dependency. I like to sit down occasionally, with a smoke and a beer, and just think about the good times. My next favourite time to smoke is after I cry. I'm not sure why that is.

I agree with Mikko. It would be good to have those times back, just for a while, because God knows those days aren't coming back again. The lack of responsibility was sweet, I am glad I appreciated it then. I am totally excited about the future, but the past has served me well: the good and the bad. I have to admit, I am a reverse optimist, and I only really remember the good things about the past. I don't think I would have done anything differently either - and how lucky I was to be able to do the growing and friendship making in such an electric city in such a beautiful, warm country.

The picture of the shopping cart experience is somewhere in my files. I am going to search for it!